Elect Newt Because He Wants to Have a Dog in the White House

I keep saying that it has become impossible for me to distinguish whether I am reading news about any of the GOP contenders for the nomination in some actual news venue, or whether I have ended up at The Onion, and am reading clever satire. In fact, I decided today to add a link on the left among the “Politics” site to The Onion. Frankly, the reporting there is often better and more accurate on current events than what one can find at the New York Times or Washington Post.

After a surge in the polls as the latest Not-Romney, which lasted all of three weeks or so until his polling plunged back down into third or fourth place in the current GOP Clown Car Parade, Newt Gingrich’s latest plan to win the hearts of Americans and thus forge his way forward into the White House is the latest example of this phenomenon. A little editorial emphasis added in the following.

The campaign said today that it will soon launch a “Pets With Newt” site aimed at Gingrich’s love for animals, intended to show a “lighter side” of the candidate. “As speaker I made it possible for people in public housing to keep their pets in 1988. I love pets so we’re going to have an entire project,” Gingrich said.

Gingrich doesn’t have any pets at this time, but he told ABC News today he and his wife Callista want a dog in the White House, and it’s a friendly disagreement between the couple over what kind and size of dog. Callista wants a small dog and Newt wants a large dog, though he says dogs like a Great Dane are a little too large.

The campaign also plans to release a music education video starring Callista, who is a classically trained musician and signer. “A music education video from my wife will be on the importance of music education and her background as a classical French horn player and a singer in the Basilica.”

The campaign’s approach is to show a fun side of the former Speaker of House and involve Callista more in the campaign.

Gingrich to Campaign With Pets and Music

Well, gee, how can Americans turn down offers like these? How can an America people that think quality television equals “reality” shows not respond positively to this? Newt and Callista in the latest episode of Dancing with the Pets!

Any man who has never had pets but is willing to get one, and even promise to have one in the White House, is clearly presidential timber. Especially one who is a now reformed serial adulterer, and whose current trophy wife with whom he cheated while still married to his second trophy wife can play the French horn.

How could America go wrong with a man like this as president?

And the GOP Clown Car battle for the nomination rolls on.


Author: Ron